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:icontursiops33: More from tursiops33


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Submitted on
July 24, 2010
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I found my love,
And she's called Maria,

I love her to bits,
And she feels just the same,

But it's an impossible love,
Because Maria is a wooden doll,

I tried to ask my local church,
I tried to ask the highest priest,

But no one wants to marry us,
But no one understands true love,

I was exiled to the forest,
And I kept crying and crying,

And several drops hit Maria,
She started to glow,

She started to transform,
Into a beautiful woman,

I'm yours forever she said,
I'm yours forever I said,

Because there's just nothing,
As forbidden love.
There you go! Another one inspired by the ideas and comments on my current poll: [link] Go participate and have a poem created just for you too like many others.

You can listen to me live reading it on the 36th episode of my podcast that you can find here: [link]

Poem detailed explanation:

So to start with the inspiration that brought me to write this poem. It comes from two things, first from a song called "Cahin-Caha" from the "Mes souliers sont rouges" band, and second from a poll I did on my profile on deviantart.com where CremeOfRolo suggested that I write something about forbidden love, so I did.
For the poem in itself, I started by coming up with a big punch line to get the reader's interest. Then continuing on this path I slowly give some more details about it, to keep the reader interested.
Now the big reveal is done! I'm not talking about a regular love but about an impossible one. Regular loves are boring because nothing interesting enough to make a poem comes out. But impossible loves are much more interesting, and this can take so many forms and aspects… This time it's about a love between a man and a wooden doll.
And what do you do when you're in love, well you want to marry of course. So without saying it, I made myself understood by saying that the man was looking for a priest. The interesting thing here is that the first sentence consist of the first try of the man to get married, failing that he goes to the second sentence and the second failure.
This is well describes in the next two lines, where I explain that the church can be so close minded, because love is love after all even between two beings that normally shouldn't have loved each other. Next I talk about being exiled to the forest, because in old times, and in current times too, when you're too weird and that you're fighting to keep being who you really are, other people make you an outcast because you don't fit in the mold, and therefor cannot continue living between the people who are in the mold.
Here there is a double sadness, first because no one understand his love for his doll, and second because he was exiled, and those two things would make anyone pretty sad. But at the bottom of the pit of gloom there the hope lies. And to show it, I wanted something magical, just like in the song. It's like the man by crying gave birth to his love, and showed everyone that it was actually a real person he was loving, but only him could see it, only him had the will to open his mind and try the impossible.
To finish big, I made it sound like the wedding was right there, both saying "yes" to each other. And also in the last two sentences showing that anything can be possible and that there is nothing impossible if you really believe in it.
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:iconmidnightraven6:
MidnightRaven6 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2011
i like the concept. This was very interesting and i liked the twist you added. I thought the happy ending was a nice touch. I tend to live an unhappy life so i think it is nice to see things turn out happy.
Reply
:icontursiops33:
tursiops33 Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! Yes I usually like to have happy endings, as I'm an optimist guy ^^
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:iconmidnightraven6:
MidnightRaven6 Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2011
you're welcome :D
Reply
:iconcat94208:
cat94208 Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2010
Nice poem. It sounds like it would make a great fairy tale.
Reply
:icontursiops33:
tursiops33 Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you, yes it would certainly do.
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:icondameodessastock:
DameOdessaStock Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2010
Amazing :)
Reply
:icontursiops33:
tursiops33 Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you.
Reply
:iconblackcatsrule:
blackcatsrule Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2010  Student General Artist
Like everyone else, I like the concept. xD
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:icontursiops33:
tursiops33 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :d
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:iconfuzzyalligator:
fuzzyalligator Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
That was really good. I like the fantasy-like feel of it.
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